… Ouch!

And that’s not Ouch as a result of being Gore’d by a unicorn or savaged by zombies. It’s Ouch as in credit card scorching Ouch.

I am now the proud owner of GoreWear:

• Alpine Lady Goretex Paclite waterproof ( a cycling jacket wiffout a hoodie)
• Goretex Paclite hood for the above (so I can do that hoodie thing)
• Windstopper arm warmers
• Windstopper leg warmers (look how slimming they are - ha!)

I have previously been Gore’d by the Goretex Paclite waterproof troos.

Credit card not impressed!

Never fear, this is not a post about me getting nekkid. It’s about my latest piece of cycling attire.

Recently, Le Chef was in Finland giving workshops peppered with bizarre acronyms and he met with our pal Eeva. He told Eeva about my silly cycling trip and she very kindly sent me a Buff. A Buff is a thing that you can put on your head or round your neck or round your hand. It’ll keep the sun off the poor peely-wally Scottish lobster skin, I can use it cover my whole head when mosquitoes attack at night time and used as a balaclava in case I need to hold up a grocery store (this is unlikely coz the shopkeeper will have a gun and I’ll have, eh, a bicycle pump).

Thank you Eeva for the clever Buff.

… zoom, Zoom, ZOOM! I love zooming on my bike.

Zooming down Lauriston Place. Zooming through Tollcross. Speeding along Ponton Street, lining up to take the sweeping turn to the left onto Fountainbridge. Sssslllliiiiipppppp, ssssliiidding away. Dismounting the bike gracefully sans road rash (Gussie: a technique I need to teach you for getting aff the bike’s fer boys) as it skids away from me straight under the wheels of a number 34 bus destroying my beautiful Trans North America mount.

…. is what I thought of today as I took the corner too fast. I didn’t skid and I didn’t crash but I did have the above vision.

You know about road rash don’t you ? Leaving your skin on the street, your hide on the highway and dermis on the drive. If you are feeling up to check the Brave Soldier Road Rash Gallery.

I don’t like to over train. I don’t want to peak too soon.

So it has been one month since my last training trip but since them I have been very busy doing pseudo training like  buying books and looking at maps, planning routes, polishing my bike, repairing punctures and coming up with excuses not to go on my bike. (I actually go on my bike every day but that’s only for 4 miles). But today after work I cycled to South Queensferry and back. T the speed boy showed me a very nice route following National Cycle Network route 76.

… my new shorts ? They are fab! Baggy, with velcro and zippy bits and the obligatory nappy. But the nappy is detachable and has been detached!

… thank you Routeslip for helping with my route through Wyoming.

Just the other day Le Chef said But Wyoming is flat. I remember driving there and it was flat.

Pah I said You know nothing!

Look at the profile. Apart from a big downhill after a murderous climb all I can see is up!